Supporting women whose lives have been touched by breast cancer

No Reconstruction

by sp

I had my mastectomies done almost a year apart - the first time I had the cancer taken away and the second op was done at my request. I had invasive lobular carcinoma and am triple negative, all of which point to the possibility of the cancer returning, and I didn't want to go through all the chemo and rads as a single woman I couldn't financially afford not to work for another year. I had a year with only one boob and to be honest that felt worse than having none - I think one of the other ladies mentioned that being even was what felt right, whether that was having one reconstructed or having both removed.

I won't say that I didn't shed a tear for my good breast (happy to see the back of the cancerous one!) but three years down the line (and having lost a very close friend to BC - who only had a lumpectomy), I miss my old life and body but am looking forward to living a new life with a different body...the point being I'm here and I'm alive.

I lost my mum to overian cancer nearly 15 years ago and I know that she did all she could to fight that cancer, but it was in a place that though it couldn't be seen was close to other organs and she died after three years of treatment.

I broke my ankle a couple of months ago and as I was leaving the hospital on crutches a man was being wheeled in with his leg missing from the knee - I'm sure he'd have loved to have a broken ankle - but he was laughing and joking with the person pushing him, he was making the most of his life.

What I'm trying to say (badly) is that YOU matter and your friends and family matter but the two lumps of flesh (not even organs) on the front of your body do NOT matter - especially if they are harbouring life threatening cells.

If you feel you are going to be unable to cope with losing your breasts then do look into the various kinds of reconstruction available - I've looked at some good reconstructions (and some not so good) but know that they will never live up to what I have taken away (cancerous or not!) so am happy without them.

At the end of the day only you know how you will cope with or without your breasts and there is no right or wrong decision - just the decision that is right for you.

I hope I haven't rambled too much - good luck with reaching your decision.